by Jennifer C. Goddard
“Horses and life…it’s all the same to me.”
-- Buck Brannaman, Horse Whisperer
Anyone who knows me well knows that when I’m not working with attorneys, I work with horses. Through the years, I’ve found that when I’m really stuck trying to help an attorney, I can turn to my horses for inspiration.
Last week we wrote about phone calls generated by AdWord campaigns, and how they require different handling than calls from people who are referred by other professionals. These callers typically don’t really know what they need, they don’t know the legal jargon, and they tend to blurt out things like, “What do you charge for a will?”
Understandably, some attorneys (and their staff) find this seemingly crass approach off-putting.
But I’d like you to consider a different perspective, one I learned from working with horses.
When you put a greenhorn into a corral with a horse and ask him to catch the horse, the first thing he does is grab a halter and a rope and head straight for the horse, who responds by … walking away. The greenhorn keeps walking and the horse keeps skittering away. Greenhorn walks faster, horse starts to trot. Pretty soon they’re both running around in circles.
The horse will be scared, and the greenhorn will be frustrated.
His Fear Keeps Him Running
It doesn’t have to be like this. Horses are herd animals who don’t like to be alone. They actually would rather be with you than out there running around alone. It’s his fear that keeps him running. He wants to be with you, but he’s not sure he can trust you. He’s afraid you’re going to hurt him. So every time you approach, he runs away. The more you chase him, the more you confirm his fear. Do this for very long and that horse can become almost uncatchable, he’s so sure that you’re out to “get” him.
Think Differently
An experienced horse person who understands how a horse thinks and feels does things differently. The experienced horse person walks into the corral and, instead of walking straight up to the horse, stands still for a bit. An experienced horse person reads the horse’s body language, pays attention to how the horse moves his feet and holds his ears and mouth, even his tongue. Paying attention to all of these cues, the experienced horse person has empathy for a fearful horse and gives that horse time and space, letting the horse see that there’s nothing to fear.
Eventually, the horse’s desire to join up overpowers his fears. With patience, the experienced horse person will have that horse walking right up to her, following her around like a puppy dog.
Your Prospective Clients Are Afraid, Too
The people calling your firm are a lot like those horses in the corral. They call because they have a problem: either something bad has happened in their lives, or they are afraid something bad is going to happen. They call because they want help, they want to join up … but they don’t know if they can trust you.
If you rush toward them, you will scare them off. If you make them feel stupid, put them on hold, transfer them to a stranger, or if you are offended because they awkwardly ask how much you charge for a will, they are going to run.
Just like that horse.
And, just like that horse, they are afraid you are going to hurt them. Oh, they don’t think you’re going to beat them or eat them for dinner; they are afraid you will overcharge them, give them bad advice or even lie to them.
Empathy, Compassion and Patience
Empathy, compassion and patience will go a long way with both horses and people.
Remember, people only ask the “how much” question because they don’t know what else to ask. They are testing you, observing you. They want to be sure you are not going to hurt them. They are waiting for you to earn their trust, give them some confidence and welcome them in.
To achieve that level of trust and confidence, they have to be comfortable asking questions, talking to a real person who is sympathetic to their concerns, and who they believe will put their interests first.
Don’t respond to the “how much” question by going right after the person with your best sales pitch. Remember, they’re just like that horse and likely to run away. Instead, try drawing them in with another question. Ask what’s going on. Give them the time and space to tell their story and discover that you can be trusted.
It’s good horse sense!